#mythbuster

Local Nigerian myths

There are old stories from different parts of the world on the reason for problems , luck , successor health.

I would like to introduce you to the common sayings from my homeland d Nigeria.  The five popular myths are

Itching palms  and twitching eye brows: Money is coming.

 This is a popular story and  you would like to know if this is true. Sorry No! The hand itches in reality due to excess dry skin. Your eyebrows twitch as a result of muscles around you face are stressed. I had a crazy two weeks of my left eye brow twitching so much I had a headache. I shared this with a friend and he seemed so happy that he proclaimed a huge monetary blessing was to befall me. Yeah right!  A month later, no such magical event happened. I realized I was too stressed out from work. 

A piece of thread will cure Hiccup in babies

Now before you say anything, I had to do this practically. My goodness it works. My little niece had the case of hiccups and we were too far for water. I took a piece of thread from my dress and placed it on her head. After a few minutes, the hiccups stopped.

There is not scientific explanation or evidence to support this theory on how true the old midwives tale really is. But if the baby has a very bad case of hiccups, please just give him water (warm is advisable).

Don’t walk over someone legs

This is definitely not true. If you are sitting on the bare floor and stretch out both your legs, someone crosses over your limbs while you lay down. You will have a child that looks exactly like the person who just walked over you, this genetically not possible. It’s just an old Nigerian story to stop young people from bad manners. It is designed to improve our etiquette.

Eating while standing, while make you slimmer or the food will go to your legs.

Please!, Abeg!, since while did your stomach connect to your limbs. False; 100 %. Kindly do some exercise to reduce the weight.

DOES HE LIKE YOU?

#feelingconfused

This  might sound odd but it happens to a lot of us (by this i mean single and no seen, not sure).Does he like you? was the title i read up at epphany.com by google on twitter. And i wanted to share my views. Please note, my views also applies to women as well. ( so don't think of me as a feminist).
 The 5 steps to note by this Epphany are as follows:

5:HE IS TOUCHY
 They say that  being touchy;shows he is emotional and vulnerable.
The matters of the heart can be tricky but i don't  want it to be confused with  actions like; when he seems to be checking your phones call log, or calls you up at random every day, asking  where you are? whom you are with? (A.k.a Psycho tendency  or mad man ability) Always loses his temper when you don't agree with him. Now! that could best describe being touchy.

 4:HE IS LOOKING AT YOUR LIPS
This is an unspoken way that shows he is sexually attracted to you. If you ever watch Telenova or Telemundo  or the Indian series. They tend to show this displayed characteristics. In Nigeria, it could mean he is shy but also could mean he is a sexual pervert, original player.My meaning they all do the same moves, so that number 4 it's not clear. He might even have eye problems, but if a guy looks straight at your breast,as the 80's song goes " it's all about sex baby!...."

 3:HE CAN'T STOP SMILING AT YOU.
Hmm! watch Discovery channel or the Wild life channel on D.S.T.V, the predator always smiles at the prey. See the picture to this. Do you think the king fisher was angry when he caught that good fish? No! he was smiling home. If he smiles a lot like my friend Manji who was born that way, because the muscles on his face move just one other direction except when he eats.Lol! okay! seriously, if  there are no jokes said, comedy watched. The man is CRAZY! RUN!




 2: HE IS GENUINELY NICE TO YOU
No more Mr. nice Guy! Is that statement true? Honestly, i don't know.  Define what is nice? opening the door, or introducing you to his friends? Asking your opinion on the menu? Or ignoring you when football is on the tv? I don't know but you should.for instance your girlfriend leaves you alone, whenever her friends shows up? or he never says thank you, at all. In Lagos, its scarce to meet really nice people, even in church. People seems to be nice to you for something to gain. Don't believe me? Ask the everyday working class Nigerian.



1: YOU JUST HAVE THAT GUT FEELING!
My take on this is simple. Your "GUT" is also called your stomach. you know that saying " you have butterflies in your tummy whenever he is around, because you love him" STORY!
It could be hunger that is confusing you, your stomach was not designed for detecting your emotions. Your "Belly" can feel funny whenever you are nervous, not when you are in love.
To yourself but true! that's the best advise i can give you.



So, be careful of all the junk, romantic, psychological things written up on the internet. Think them through, please. Do act on every information ladies and gents. Have a great day!

BOOK REVIEW

BOOKS FOR THIS MONTH?

PHILIP BEGHO
 #ReCoNNect #philpbeghobooks

Philip Begho the award wining Author.

As promised, lets talk about the must have books this Month. Its the time to inspire your minds and that of your families. The ReCoNNect movement is aimed to get everyone into reading. I noticed that parents and kids don't connect in any level, in this  i mean, they can not have a good conversation and the rate at which our kids vocabulary is deteriorating with short abbreviations like LOL, ASAP, XOXO, LMAO. It is a miracle they can spell well. i don't want to go into creative imagination and good values.    Most parents rather live their children's schools to teach them home values because they are super busy. Remember when Tale's by moonlight was a program back in the days we would run home on Sunday , just to hear what tortoise did or what girl or naughty boy got from disobedience. Christian values are not  been explained to our children How many parents can read mybook of bible stories and explain these to their kids.

PHILIP BEGHO, author of over one hundred books, is an award-winning Nigerian writer (playwright, screenwriter, children's writer, novelist, short story writer and poet). A lot of Philip's Begho's books have these old school morals and religious values  from Toju and Tosan adventures  based on popular bible stores to society ideas of moral and how it can affect kids. Ant boy series who loves to help people and must obey his parents. I can go on.  I love Jelly baby is  by far the most exciting novel with mystery that keeps you  on your sit.

 "I began writing at the age of eleven at King's College Lagos when materials were solicited for the school magazine and my short stories were accepted and published. Being able to break out from working as a lawyer to working as a writer has been a dream come true. The price has been steep, but the fulfillment of any dream sweetens the pain of its price."

The list of awards he has received include:
 Association of Nigerian Authors (ANA) Drama Prize 1994
    Lire en Fête Short Story 1st Prize 2001[13]
    ANA/NDDC JP Clark-Bekederemo Prize for Drama 2002
    ANA/Matatu Prize for Children’s Literature 2003
    Isidore Okpewho Prose Prize 2003[2]
    ANA/Atiku Abubakar Prize for Children’s Literature 2005 
He also writes dramas for children,  adults and is a trained lawyer. Philip enjoys writing .. My favorites  of Philip's books include TitiRella, Jelly baby, Smallie series, Aunty Felicia series, the short story Crab story.  All his books are available online: Jumia  and Amazon only. The best part, it is extremely affordable. His books price range from N200- N1200.
 

Drama

    Daniel (aka Power of Lions; Lagos: Monarch Books, 2001)
    Esther (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2002)
    Job's Wife (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2002)
    Titi Rella (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2004)[2]
    Jephthah’s Daughter (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2006)
    Leopard Woman (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Traffic Jam Kids (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Solomon (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Joseph (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Nebuchadnezzar (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Jael (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Born King (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Predator (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 2: When Should I Marry? (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 3: The Rubbishians (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 4: The Marriage Seminar (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 5: The Beggar (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 6: The Sandwich (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 7: Five Storybooks (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 8: Two-Way Street (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 9: World Peace Day (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 10: School Daze (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 11: The NEPA Statue (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Smallie 12: True Democracy (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)

Prose

    Songbird (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2002)[2]
    Strange World (A collection of short stories; Lagos: Monarch Books, 2004)
    Jelly Baby (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2004)
    Aunty Felicia (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2003)
    Aunty Felicia Returns (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2005)
    Aunty Felicia Goes to Yankari (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Aunty Felicia Goes to School (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Aunty Felicia in the Evil Forest (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Aunty Felicia Goes to Church (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    King Omatosan (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Chuma the Terror (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)
    Crab Story (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2010)

Poetry

    Tulip of the Nile (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2003)[2]

Non-fiction

    Company Formation: Precedents on Objects of Incorporation (1986; Lagos: Monarch Books, 1993, 2003, 2009)
    Tongues Aflame (Lagos: Monarch Books, 2003)[2]
PLEASE NOTE NOT ALL THE BOOKS ARE ON THIS LIST: otheres available on line include

• Chuma the terror
• The brave Queen
• The Proud King
• The mermaid
• Maroko outcast
• wolf girl
• Friendly fire
• GRand treachery
• Song Bird
• Penny for an orphan
• Trafficked!
• The yellow sports mercedes
• The talking tree
• A greater mermaid
• A strange sight 
• A strange man
• Lady strange
• club of vengeance 
• Out of a snake e.t.c

NO ROMANCE WITHOUT FINANCE

 HELP A BROTHER OUT

 #helpabrotherout  

 “To be romantic , you have to first be adventurous”

A lot of young men believe that you need to be super rich to take a lady out. Okay, I know it’s said that ladies are scarce but babes are plenty in the market. Unfortunately that statement is very true.

Let me clarified the difference what I mean by the previous statement; “a lady” has manners, she does not settle to be treated like a maid. She has values, she may or may not be working, and her age is not the issue because she could be sixteen. She would never spend the night with you on the first or even 8^th date; in fact not at all. She is cultured, well read and can speak eloquently (not necessarily in English). She must be respected and understood. She is submissive but not stupid. 

 “A Babe” on the other hand has no vision, no focus; she wears whatever any celebrities that seem to be in vogue are wearing. She cannot understand the word self respect because she either underestimate herself or believes that this is old school/old fashions ideals. She is ready to spend every dime she earns (or steals) on clothes, human hair, makeup or shoes. Please note that half her conversation is based on her clothes, labels, and other people. She could be a graduate, working with a good company and has not problem sleeping with you or her boss. *wink*

Now, we have that out of the way. Yes! We were discussing about money and a good first date impression. From my research; most guys always takes their date to any fast food eatery. I have one word to say to that: ”BORING”.  What happened  to nice quiet picnics?

Well! I’m here to help a brother out. Guess what?  try the LEKKI CONSERVATION PARK, in Lekki, Lagos, Nigeria. It is going to be the walk of your life. For real! You guys will walk.

 I had a trip with two of “my besties” and I knew our friendship will last after this lifetime coz we walked through that crazy swampy forest, looking a monkeys and most times just trees. Hearing the crickets scream! ( Yes o!, it didn’t sound like chirping to me)

 Climbing the rope bridge  but due to reasons unexplained e.g.  We didn’t want to die with the “oyinbos” a.k.a. White people in front of us at the bridge, so we had to turn back. There were pleasant surprises at the end of the path.

We got to the park with barbecues spots, gigantic chess boards, snake and ladders, monopoly. 

I was excited to see the”Koi” fish; they were so big and colorful.  Yeah! the tortoises were there and peacocks but the fish won the show for such a journey. There were lovely huts with gorgeous chairs and tables. You can bring you own food and have a picnic even a party.

Enough space to have a quiet time with the lady in your life. How much did it cost to trek more than one kilometer and get the paradise experience?  Just N1000 per head.  

Budget:

1. Gate fee; N1000 per head
2.  food drinks: N2000 per head (make sandwiches or buy snacks, don't go for pure water. that's too cheap)
3. Transport( by bus): N3000 (it could be less)
4. Total amounts to :N7000-N10,000.

Hmm! Your lady? if she is the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Oh! You will know for sure, if she will stay the long hull with you, if/when she completes that journey without killing you in the forest *wink*.

 Have an amazing, simple and affordable lifestyle guys. Get inspired!

#GISTME

Killer skinny jeans, that can kill you?

This is the trend for every lover of jeans that flatter your curvy body. I am talking about the woman with curves. We know a lot of men have embraced the skinny jeans but i still feel sorry for guys that wear them, because it must be very uncomfortable for the circulation to their genitals.

I was watching the WENDY Williams show during the week, that's "the scoop"for the topic and she mentioned a lady in Australia also died from her skinny jeans. it caused an medical condition called; "Compartment syndrome "

This is serious condition where the blood supply around your thighs are cut off and your veins might die off. In short, you might lose one or both of your legs.

Beauty knows no pain! yeah right! I understand you need to be drop dead sexy but is it worth your legs. I seen a lot of young ladies with extremely tight skinny jeans; you are the are prone to this syndrome.

Also know your body types: there are 4 groups:This includes 3 body shape types in each group

1. Pear, Bell, Skittle
2. Brick, Goblet, apple
3. Vase, hour glass, Cello
4. Cornet, Lollipop, column.

Its a good idea to know your body type in order to have a great fitting, read up / research
http://www.denimblog.com/c/a/the-12-womens-body-types-and-jeans-that-will-flatter-each


Know your leg o!, in Nigeria there are 3 types of legs,"K", "1" &" Bow" No comment!

 Ok, a longer loose fitting jacket might have given her a great finish.

 
 Good luck! look good but stay healthy conscious ladies. Dude, get off skinny jeans pls. its so uuuughly!

BOTTOMS UP LADIES?

 SHOULD I DRINK TO THAT? #lookinggood

It is August the month of all things weird but cool. What i mean by this is the weather is not all that predictable. Rains come in sporadically, sun is not friendly at times  but that is not what the topic is about. Enough blabbing nonsense and more serious talk.
Ladies! the fashion of this season goes to two interesting labels. 
"Bottoms up" is not your behinds but dressing based on the bottom you need to put in your ward robe. We are talking "Skirts" simple!
Every girl in Nigeria has at least one black skirt, I guess that is the norm here. Bottoms up means to match your outfit with your skirt first and not the other way round.

Lets try a bit of colour and and a few embellishments. Makay embellishments and Tracy Reese are my two favourite girls for this month on their new designs of skirts and colours.

Nneamaka Nwafo is a Nigerian with a difference and founder of  Makay embellishment. She is also their creative director/ designers for more than. I enjoy wearing a lot of her creations, even when  i put on a bit of weight and i can still put on my clothes with ease. She knows how a woman should look, good!.
 Her designs are pure originality and taking note of your body form. It flatters your curves. She is an artist as well and one major description i have for her creations; would be simplicity with classic designs that are timeless. You can check out her other creations on Facebook, just follow this link: https://www.facebook.com/nneamaka.nwafo?fref=ts

Long Black skirts by Makay Embellishments: style names, blaze, droplets,feather and hypnosis. Ready wear  and available from size 10- 14. Call:+2347063695212

Tracy Reese is an American fashion designer who specializes in women's ready-to-wear clothing, accessories, and home fashions such as linens. She is a board member of the Council of Fashion Designers of America, having been inducted in 2007. For more views on Her creations for follow this link: http://www.vogue.co.uk/fashion/spring-summer-2010/ready-to-wear/tracy-reese

Wrap skirt by Top shop. Simply lovely!

Tracy Reese fluffy with pockets.

Tracy Reese. Sexy, clingy orange print skirt

Zebra prints can never go out of style. design by Tracy Reese.

"TIME TO LOOK GOOD THIS AUGUST.

 SO LADIES YOU KNOW WHAT? BOTTOMS UP! CHEERS!"

HAVE A GREAT MONTH! : )

#GISTME!

How to MAKE UP, and avoid a BREAK UP? 

Hello everybody, Yeah i must apologize for staying away too long on this blog. Welcome to #GISTME in pidgin English, the word means to tell you all some cool things, ideas, stories.

So, I had call from a dear friend who just fought with the love of his life. I pray he doesn't kill after this article but i feel the need to let out the fact that; I have noticed that many Nigerian couples have forgotten to that relationships can be stressful e.g. in Lagos state and quarrels do happen, misgivings, fears from past relations can creep into your new one, if you let them in. There are few things that young ladies and gentlemen should know about how to handle situation and not get tips from "Telemundo" or any of these weird soap operas.

I'll give my Do not go there tips

1. NEVER SHOUT AT YOUR MAN IN PUBLIC OR IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS/ PALS/ FAMILY. NEVER!Save your voice o! Same applies to guys.

   

   No hand gestures, no drama. Be angry but keep your cool. In fact eat first. Try dude.

2. SILENT TREATMENT NEVER WORKS!!! 
   

   

   Ignoring the one your love over an issue would only make matter worst. Do the christian thing, love you neighbour.

3. YOU HAVE  LESS THAN 24HOURS TO RECONCILE. 
   HOW?  This is where you need to be creative. The innovations of IT has not really helped in couples communicating, in fact we have become lazy. To be honest, you need to be creative! Make up sex doesn't really work. Yes! I am saying it to married couples. To say "Sorry" on a budget. Write a note first expressing how you feel, try to accompany it with flowers,  fruit basket or fruits in a big nylon bag (make sure is a fine clean nylon bag)
   

   

   This will cost you minimum N5,000 without the basket.

Lagos state does not have cheap flowers  shops that you go to buy or order.
 So may I suggest you jump the fence and pick one, you could make one by using vegetables like "Ugwu", "Water leaf" and "Shoko"; for laughs, avoid bitter leaf. Or pick random flowery branches, tie them together with a thread first before wrapping with a newspaper. Not a good idea?! Note not all Nigeria woman like flowers. So the task is to think before you act. We hope you know you partner?

"Over the top" Peace basket with nuts added with nice french or California wines, Chocolate and a nice jewellery set. for the lady . that would cost within the range N25,000-30,000 

 If she loves sweets, get her that also along with other things that are not sooo expensive. Put them all in a basket. Send a voice message telling her/him how you are sorry. Write a sweet letter/ note (p.s. less then half the page) attached to basket. That your peace offering.
Fresh fruits from the market, should be hand picked (make sure no rotten ones get in the mix) washed  and packed in a bag or arranged in a basket.  No sane girl can resist fruits.  You can place your orders with Eb'le events for the fruit baskets, call 08141196366.
 I believe there is a promo from 27th-31st for July 2015. 

For the record: DO NOT BUY ANY AFRICAN WOMAN A FRUIT BASKET FOR HER BIRTHDAY.

Whatever you do, make up first with that person you love. Don't get other people to plead/ intercede on your behalf before you do. Try first! then if all fails. You can relax that you made the effort to made fences.

Have a romantic adventure!

BEER BELLY! Not fashionable? hmmm

 Well!I almost believed there was no way any Nigerian man in his late thirties or forties can exist without the protruding belly. For my dear reader who is not familiar with this phrase, "Beer belly"  is an extension of the belly without any food in it,. Yes! that's my definition for this trend.

That is the reason i could not take you home to my parents.

 It does not just happen to lager/beer drinking men but also to those who have an unhealthy eating habit, Some ladies also have this from, you could mistaken them for pregnant women. Is this a healthy lifestyle. No! its not fashionable and can result to very unhealthy state of health. I know that our traditional outfit seems to encourage that big belly thing e.g. Agbada, Kaftan, buba, Senegalese, wrappers but God bless our young designer like YOMI CASUALS e.t.c. for making fitted native outfits for men more cooler than the old papa styles ( No offense intended)

You can still be sexy at least for your wife. #thinkaboutit

 CAN YOU GET BACK IN SHAPE?
 Of course,dear, not matter how old you are, you can get back in shape by exercising and dieting. I understand the need to try something new. If you love life and love looking good, make up you mind to go to a gym. If you can't afford that option, go for walks(Prayer walks) take a long walk during the cool evenings, pray for everyone, listen to music from your phone and stretch when you get home.(so many options are out there, Google up) also you can try citrus grapes, they look like oranges but only bigger, Cut back on your soda, beer and heavy swallow a.k.a. fufu, eba, semo. Eat for one and not the community. Go for white meat: fish, grilled chicken or turkey.

You don't have to be a millionaire to look like him above.

 To my brother that is very single ,searching, hoping. Your physic can score you points with the ladies. Just saying my 2kobo on this matter. And my African Divas with the light chocolate skin, dark syrup skin tone, don't let your tummy go please! I beg you. Workout, eat right, sleep well. Elegance is our culture.
In Short: Beer belly is  not fashionable! period. Cheers!

THE GOOD OLD DAYS

THE GOOD OLD DAYS
Once again I'm forced to remember the richness of my past, a reality that, unfortunately is lost upon this generation. As a child I was drawn to the vast libraries of my uncles, filled with authors like Ian Fleming, Dilibe Onyeama and Sidney Sheldon.

 Nights without power were spent listening to mum's tales or dad's 'School of life' anecdotes. We grew up watching Sesame Street and Kidivision 101. We read Othello for fun and kicked footballs for lunch. We played checkers, chess, ludo, "whot", ayo and table soccer. The streets were our 100m tracks and the neighbourhood parking lot was our Wembley stadium. We went camping, killed snakes, raised pigeons, caught electric fish and marched on national holidays. We were Scouts, Brigadiers, Guides, school parents and super cyclists!
We knew our history, and were familiar with Mansa Musa, Shaka, Jaja and Kosoko. The blood of a thousand empires flowed through our veins.
We bought birthday cards....and if we couldn't afford them, we made them ourselves.
We cooked and cleaned, while Fela informed us that Water had no enemies and Majek was fleeing rainstorms

Tragically, the flood of information has watered down our ability to communicate, reducing the context of our conversations to abbreviations, emoticons and a jumble of letters. Nowadays we type 'HBD' for an annual event because typing the whole thing takes too much work.
Our grammer is atrocious, the musical hits of our time plumb new depths of mediocrity as each song is merely a celebration of ill gotten wealth or sensual prowess.
We are ignorant of our history and commit the greater sin of not wanting to learn. Our social lives are restricted to the sizes of our information devices, loved ones and friends reduced to mere contacts on a screen, greeted with the perfunctory 'lol' or the annoying 'kk'.
We seem to have traded the richness of life for the opportunity to hustle, and like Judas, given away what we were for what we are ashamed to be.
written by Jeremy Chaba
https://www.facebook.com/jeremy.chaba?fref=ts